Outside a school somewhere in the global South. A 4x4 containing a World Bank Economist (WBE) and Pearson education adviser screeches to a halt. Enter a teacher to investigate the cloud of dust.

WBE:              Holy baloney, what's this dump?

TEACHER:     This is our school

WBE:              Who the heck are you?

TEACHER:     I'm a teacher and you're disturbing my class

WBE:              Well here's the thing, honey, we're promoting quality education for all

TEACHER:     Oh good well we need desks, books, walls would be nice, school dinners - most of the children are hungry most of the time. School transport might be good oh and we need toilets and more teachers because I've got 120 in my class and . .  .

WBE:              Hold your horses – who do you think's going to pay for all that?

PEARSON:     If I may interrupt – I think the problem this teacher has, old man, is that she is looking at inputs – what we need to look at is outcomes

TEACHER:     Eh?

PEARSON:    Now we at Pearson are developing global portals for school data . . .

TEACHER:    Pearson? Isn't that the company they'e complaining about in the US -  some scandal in Los Angeles?

PEARSON:    My dear young woman – we at Pearson are on the board of the Global Partnership for Education look we've got scripted lesson plans, based on our own Pearson developed curriculum and testing materials (hands TEACHER a pile of boxes)

TEACHER:      But it's in English – the children here don't speak English

WBE:              Don't speak the language of the global marketplace? – well they'd better get on and learn . . .

PEARSON:     And we at Pearson have got all the materials you need to make sure they do (hands her another pile of boxes)

TEACHER:     But I don't want to teach in English and what's more I'm not going to

PEARSON:    And here, old chap, testing materials we need to check on this teacher's work – here you are, young woman (hands a pile of paper to TEACHER) 

TEACHER:    What's this? – I don't want all this rubbish – I've got enough to do

WBE:             You better had, honey, or you may get a pay cut

TEACHER:      A pay cut? But I only get a dollar a day  

WBE:             Right how much is all this going to come to?

PEARSON:    Scale it up to every school in the country – I should say a modest squillion dollars

TEACHER:    A squillion dollars! Think how many toilets you could buy for a squillion dollars!

PEARSON:    No need – we're starting up low fee private schools, we don't need your pathetic public school – I mean look at the state of it

WBE:             Right let's go and see the Education Minister and get this ball rolling

The World Bank Economist and Pearson man screech off in their 4x4, leaving the Teacher surrounded by boxes and paper blowing in the wind